To our detriment we have allowed society, the media, the entertainment industry, etc to shape the norms of society. In fact, we have allowed everything but the only source that really counts, the Bible, to shape these norms. To change society the confrontation is never initially direct, but subtle and subversive. When I was growing up, being a man was something to be proud of. In those days the entertainment industry elevated the role of a man with the likes of John Wayne being an example of what masculinity looked like. He was decisive, wise, not afraid to take action, willing to risk his life for the sake of others, thought of others more than himself. Yes, in those days there was nothing wrong with masculinity. But ever so subtly this perception changed. Always with a humorous twist in commercials, in TV sitcoms, in movies the man slowly changed to a bumbling, mindless, unwise, insensitive fool to the laughs and applauds of the unknowing audience. The wise person became the woman who needed to help this bumbling fool. In the entertainment industry masculine features were then twisted to be deemed negative. Those who expressed them were displayed as villainous, heartless, uncaring, unfeeling, arrogant, etc. But neither one of these accurately represents the Biblical man of Scripture. What society has now presented as opposite ends of the spectrum as it attempts to feminize men, the Bible has shown men who are willing to lead, take charge yet be loving and sensitive to the needs of others.
Notice David's parting words to his son and successor, Solomon in 1 Kings 2:2-3, ""I go the way of all the earth; be strong, therefore, and prove yourself a man. And keep the charge of the Lord your God: to walk in His ways, to keep His statutes, His commandments, His judgments, and His testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and wherever you turn;". We see Solomon doing this right from the outset. Difficult decisions are forced to be made as a young leader and he takes action against those such as his brother Adonijah, Abiathar the priest, and Joab who would try to divert the kingdom away from himself. But he recognizes his frailty and immaturity, so when asked by God in a dream what he would like in 3:5, Solomon responds in 3:7-9, "Now, O Lord my God, You have made Your servant king instead of my father David, but I am a little child; I do not know how to go out or come in. And your servant is in the midst of Your people whom You have chosen, a great people, too numerous to be numbered or counted. Therefore give to Your servant an understanding heart to judge Your people, that I may discern between good and evil. For who is able to judge this great people of Yours?"
What a departure there is from Biblical masculinity and today's man. Today's men in large part have distanced themselves from the Bible and in so doing have removed the only real guidebook to teaching men how to be men. We have allowed society to shape the future of masculinity between the picture of a meathead on one end of the spectrum (uncaring, insensitive, brutish) to a man who seems more feminine than masculine on the other end (weak, indecisive, being led rather than leading, submissive to everyone else but God). How do we train the next generation to be men? By becoming spiritually mature and leading according to the principles in God's Word. There are no shortcuts. We read in Hebrews 5:12-14, "For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the first principles of the oracles of God; and you have come to need milk and not solid food. For everyone who partakes only of milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, for he is a babe. But solid food belongs to those who are full age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil." Society will steal the Biblical concept of masculinity from our children and our men. It is up to us, both the men and women of God rooted firmly in God's Word to boldly confront this warped view of gender roles that society is attempting to promote and put forth. God defines gender and it's roles, society should not.